Tomorrows the big day. How do you even prepare yourself for something like that, where it will be the official goodbye. Seeing her for the first time in 8 months, and for the last time. The last time I’ll see her after 20 years that she’s been with me, always there encouraging me, cheering me on in the sidelines, never once faltering her faith in me. To be honest, I don’t think reality has really sunk in yet. It really hasn’t hit. Though the worst moment was probably finding her camcorder, seeing her last videos that she recorded when she was on her Europe Trip. Yah my grandma was always quite the traveler. Didn’t even knew she went to Austria, France, Italy, and who knows which other countries. She just tells us she’s going to be traveling for a couple weeks, we find it normal. Guess its in my blood to travel eh? Heck she even went to Africa before I did. Her last video was her in Paris, which ironically was also my last city in Europe (not including Dublin), and also the city I told her I wanted to live in, and she said she couldn’t wait to live there. She wanted to visit Ireland so much, I told her to wait until spring when it got warmer and not so rainy and gloomy. One month, thats when she would have been in Dublin.
So on another note, Saturday instead of going back to Dublin I’ll be going back to China to be with family there, and won’t be going back to Ireland until exams on May 1st. Its so strange how things end up. I still remember the day before I got the text from my dad, there was an entire week of sunshine predicted for Dublin, first time ever since I had been there. I had plans to go horseback riding in the morning, then the next day a picnic in Phoenix Park, and then my first sunday brunch with my roommate. I had all of April planned for trips around Ireland. The first time ever that I didn’t book any Europe trips. Then of course all those plans are shattered. That’s the biggest lesson in life I’ve learned, you can plan and plan and plan all you want, but life takes its own course. You can never prepare for things like this to happen. There’s not much I can do, but remember her for the spirited, joyous and most intelligent grandmother that she was. I wish you guys could see all the things that she did in her lifetime, the house is full of her paintings, she loved Bob Ross, couches that she wrapped up, jackets, dresses that she made for us when we were younger, she really was the most amazing and talented person I knew. You really will be missed grandma <3